On our trip to Wal-Mart together, we danced in the aisles to the store music; talked to total strangers like they were our good friends; touched everything in sight; and raced each other to the car in rubber muck boots. That is a typical day out with my youngest son. Life with him is a full throttle, hold on with both hands kind of experience. If you are prepared for the ride, it's a ton of fun. If you aren't in the right frame of mind, unprepared mentally and physically for that level of intensity, it is exhausting.
Worried about how it will be perceived or received, I often fail to express the overwhelming love, joy,and happiness that wells up inside of me. Too often I come across serious and reserved to those that I care about. My son does not have these inhibitions. He loves without boundaries or limitations. Thinking nothing of kissing someone or hugging someone, he offers love unconditionally. Recently after a luncheon at our church, my son was going down the table kissing and hugging his family members goodbye. When he got to the end of the table, he encountered a recent widower, who had sat at the table with our family. Without a moments hesitation, he leaned in and planted a big kiss on his cheek and grabbed him for a hug. Startled and surprised, the older man looked up and smiled the sweetest smile. I started to apologize but he laughed and said it was great. That is my son. People fall in love with my little man because he offers joy, humor, and entertainment with no strings attached. He has no agenda. Life is his agenda.
One of my biggest fears when my youngest started school was that they would make him lose that special "him" that everyone loves. That special spark. Have you ever met someone like that? They are so alive. So in love with life. That is my son. I was afraid that when he started school they would make him conform to their image of how he should be and I would lose what made him so very special. So far that has not happened. They seem to love and appreciate him as we do. I've worried that his lack of boundaries would cause problems with the other kids. Instead, in his backpack, I keep finding these drawings and letters from the other kids in his class. When he tells me stories about his friends at school, he doesn't just identify them by name. He ALWAYS refers to them by "my (name)". He'll tell me about "my Sally" this or "my Michael" that. I just pray that these relationships continue to grow in a positive, supportive manner. If only everyone felt that bond and affection for those around them. Wouldn't it be a nicer world to live in?
My son could teach the average person so much about life. He holds nothing back. At the end of the day, he falls asleep within minutes, totally exhausted from the energy he has put into his day. Life is not easy for him, yet he holds nothing back and attacks it with full enthusiasm. He has little concern for what others think. Instead, he is totally enthralled by the experience of life. As a "Type A" planner, I have had to learn to roll with this; go along for the ride; loosen up and enjoy the moment. That's not necessarily a bad thing. It's probably a very good thing. I can't wait to see where this journey takes us.
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